Can a father be deprived of seeing his child if he is paying child maintenance?
Paying child support or maintenance is the duty of the parent and the right of the child. When it comes to having contact with your child, the law looks at what is in the child’s best interests. If a parent is abusive, a drunk and unstable, he or she cannot argue that because child maintenance is being paid, he or she has a right to see the child. Such a right may be limited where contact is supervised, or it may be suspended, where there is no contact until the parent corrects his or her behavior. However, pending the correction, maintenance should still be paid.
Goeie aand
Ek was in n 5 jaar verhouding met n nassists gewees ons het n 2 jarige baba saam. Hy nooit n vinger gelig om te help met die baba nie ons albei het werk gehad maar hy nooit gehelp tot vandag toe nie ons is nie meer saam nie. Maar vandat my familie uitgevind het my familie 99.99% alles gehelp en betaal.
Hy dreig my as ek nie doen soos hy wil nie gaan hy mense na my familie se huis toe stuur en die baba ontvoer en ons seer maak en dood maak.
Die baba is in 2021 gebore in COVID tyd hy is onder van my resigster omdat die Pappa by die huis was met die baba. En die Pappa het daardie tyd gese dit is reg as jy die baba onder jou van register maar hy is nie op die geboorte serifkaart nie. Nou wil hy my dood verklae.
Ek het tans begin met n nuwe werk en die eks weet nie wAar ek werk of bly en die baba het skooltjie begin.
Hy weier dat ek aan between met my lewe en nuwe mense ontmoet want hy gese as hy my vang met n nuwe man gaan hy die baba ontvoer van my af.
Ek stuur Fotos en video laat hom video call as ek kan maar ek werk elke dag en komaat by die huis my ma en familie het hom geblok omdat hy hulle gevloek het en self genoem. Ek is baie bang en vrees vir my lewe en die baba sin en natuurlike my familie het n protection order gedoen teenoor hom en ek soek niks van hom af nie eers maintenance nie. Ek wil net aanbeweeg met my lewe hy stel glad nie belang in baba se lewens hy se hy doen maar hy doen dit is net vir show. Hy baie unstable en werk by n security company met n unlicensed vuurwapen
Hi there
I have been having trouble getting my son’s father to pay child support on time and I constantly have to ask him to send it. He does not always send an amount once a month and often he pays an R500 every two weeks. Sometimes he refuse to do so when we have argued over something like our son’s routine or me doing everything alone everyday and not having the time to go sit at his work (he owns a liquor shop). We are not together but he acts like we are.
We had an arguement three weeks ago at his house because he did not want our son to go sleep when it was his naptime and he did not want to start the barbeque until we left because he felt our son had enough to eat which was only an yoghurt and juice. I told him he eats food three times a day with snacks in between and that when he does not sleep when it is his naptime and he is obviously tired it messes with his bedtime and that he gets very fussy all through the night. After that we went home and he blocked me and stayed away from our son. I asked him a few times if he is coming to see him and I also let him know whenever he is done napping. I have never kept his son from him and he knows he is welcome here any time. Even before he started paying maintenance and I took care of our son’s needs he could come and see him anytime he wants or videocall him but he often stayed away on his own and said he is busy and would not come or call or ask about our son for weeks. I am not working right now and spend every day and night taking care of our son. I keep receipts of when and on what I spent the maintenance money.
On Monday he came and took our son without my consent when it was his naptime. He pushed me into the doorframe when I asked him to put him down for his nap and arrange a time and date when he wants to take him with him. He refused to tell me when he is bringing him back and declined some of my calls. When he returned he did not tell me whether our son had something to eat or if he slept and to me that is very important because I believe in routine and that stability and consistency make children feel more safe. He did the same thing today after he yelled at me when I was doing our son’s washing and he made a big scene about what a bad mother I am and how I meab nothing. He got mad when our son just looked at him and carried on playing with his toys. He took him again without a bottle or shoes and did not bring him back till much later.
I have no idea what to do and I feel the need to approach the court or professional help as he won’t talk to me unless he is cursing me and telling me how he will take my son and keep him away from me. He has an abusive history and always resolve his issues with his fists. One time when I was pregnant he got into fight with an older homeless man. I cannot eat or sleep because I am terrified and worried about what’s coming next and he has already threatened to hit me so many times when I try to talk to him.
What are my rights and how can I protect myself from him while still giving him time with his son? Please help
Good day
It may be best to go to the Children’s Court and the the Domestic Violence Court. They would be able to assist you.
Wt can i do if ihave been supportn child that is not mine
You may stop supporting.
I am an unmarried father. I have been paying the agreed maintenance that the court ordered plus extra as my ex demands extra money. Since she has refused me shared time with my son, I have now stopped paying the additional amounts and just stick to the agreed maintenance order. She has threatened to keep my son from me, can she do this even though I am sticking to my maintenance order.
We advise that you approach the Children’s Court for a contact order.
Hi There,
I have an extraordinary situation I need advice on.
My ex wife (of 12 years now) left SA with my son almost 5 years ago. She did so with my consent. I unfortunately lost my job in SA and have not been able to pay maintenance for almost 2 years now.
When I finally did get a job, I was of course very happy and shared the news with my son and asked him to please get his mother to unblock me form all communications (something she did when we were not communicating very nicely to each other, in order that I can arrange to start paying her maintenance again. Instead of unblocking me, she had papers delivered to my employer demanding maintenance including backlog etc. This has caused a huge problem and I have lost my job as a result. Self defeating, there is no doubt, but I cannot have this happen again or I will never be able to do the right thing even though I want to if it continues!
What are my rights here?
Good day
You have rights to have contact with your child in a manner which is in her best interests. The mother also has a right to approach the maintenance court for assistance.