Best Advice: What all separated parents should know before the holiday season. Use this legal advice to ensure that the holidays go by smoothly.

During the festive season, schools are out, and the holidays begin. This time of year provides a much-needed break for children from long school hours, early mornings, homework, and exams. Most parents and children welcome this relief. With school out, parents no longer have to manage homework, wash school uniforms, or ensure their children arrive at school on time. However, new challenges arise. For instance, parents still need to find ways to entertain and care for their children throughout the day, especially when they are at work.

Contact arrangements during school holidays

According to Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, during the school holidays, the contact arrangements for separated parents regarding their children often change. Typically, children spend half of the holidays with one parent, and the other half with the other parent, alternating which half they spend with each parent each year. This split usually occurs after Christmas. Some parents may follow a week-on, week-off arrangement. Occasionally, a parent may continue with the same contact schedule they had during the school term, particularly if they are working during the holidays.

Most of the time, one parent cares for the child during a portion of the holidays, allowing the other parent a break from caregiving. For instance, if the mother is the primary caregiver, she can use this time to go on a mini-vacation, catch up on reading, or enjoy an outing with friends. Therefore, holiday time can be very beneficial for both the child and the parents involved.

Sometimes, one parent wants to take the child on a holiday overseas to visit a relative, but consent is not forthcoming from the other parent. At other times, a parent wants to have more contact than they usually exercise, which would infringe on the other party’s contact rights. On the other hand, a parent may not be available to care for the child during the holidays due to work or other commitments. According to Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, these and other issues can arise during the school holidays. This article will attempt to address some of these scenarios, offering advice on when to approach the court if they cannot be resolved. Now, let us begin.

Parenting arrangements for separated parents during the holidays

Parenting arrangements for separated parents can come in various forms. It may be in the form of a mediated parenting plan, an informal documented arrangement, or an order of the Court. In other cases, the parties have some type of verbal agreement which they follow and confirm via email or text messages. Some parents use their children as intermediaries to arrange holiday contact.

Should the parents adhere to the terms of the agreement, no problems would arise during the holidays. A well-deserved holiday would be on the horizon. However, according to Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, experience suggests that problems are more likely to arise during the end-of-year holiday than at any other time of the year. This would still be the case, notwithstanding that a binding legal agreement is in place. This article aims to highlight these problems and provide you with workable solutions to avoid them. Let us start with the usual holiday contact.

Holiday contact – All families are different

All families are different. The type of contact a parent has with a child during the holidays varies from family to family. This would depend on the various family dynamics. For example, the age of the children and whether or not the parents are working during the school holidays. Another factor is whether or not they live close to each other. Whatever the Dynamics, the parenting arrangement should be workable and sensible.

Equal sharing of long and short school holidays

The usual parenting agreement would be for the parents to share school holidays equally. Of course, not all parents have the privilege of not having to work during school holidays. It is, therefore, important that prior to the holidays, parents come to a workable agreement on how contact should be exercised during that period. This is not only in the child’s best interest but in the interests of the parents concerned. Parents will not want to spend their entire holiday fighting over contact. They should use this time to spend quality time with the children and also to enjoy the holiday season.

What all separated parents should do before the holidays

According to Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, a few months before the holidays, the parents should discuss contact for that period. What worked a few years ago when the children were young might not be applicable today. For example, now the children have to attend a school camp or attend additional tuition. Furthermore, they may want to go to a sporting event for the holidays. Notwithstanding the various dynamics, the parents have to come to an agreement regarding how contact should be exercised during school holidays way in advance. Obviously, during the school term, their schedule is set.

What to do if an agreement cannot be reached

Should the parents not be able to come to an agreement regarding contact during the school holidays, it is important for them to have a look at the parenting plan or the Order of court in this regard. Usually, the parenting plan would deal with facilitation or mediation, as well as the Court Order. If it does not, it is strongly advised that you approach a mediator to assist in resolving the care and contact issues for the holidays. If that is not possible, then read on to learn more about some possible solutions.

When to approach the Court regarding holiday contact?

According to Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, the last resort for parents who cannot agree on contact during the holidays is for them to approach the court. Even if there is a court order in place, but it has since become impractical, one would expect parents to act reasonably. However, if one parent is adamant that the court order should be followed, then approaching the court is the route to follow. But before doing so, it may be wise to see a legal practitioner for legal advice on the specific issue. An attorney may also send the other parent a letter. This may resolve matters. Let us look at a few examples of when approaching the court would be necessary.

Refusal of Contact when there is no order in place

If there is no court order in place, and the primary caregiver refuses to allow you to contact your child, then first try to mediate the matter. Entering into a parenting plan would be a wise idea. If that is not possible or fails, then approaching the court would be the next step to follow. A family law attorney or advocate would be able to assist you.

There is a Court Order in place

Let’s say a court order is in place. However, it is outdated and not workable. This is so because the children are now teenagers, and contact should no longer be every second day, but for a week at a time. This is not only practical but also what the children want. If a parenting plan is in place that allows for mediation of such a matter, then mediation should be followed. If not, then a variation of the court order would be warranted. The court would always consider what is best for the children, rather than what the parents want.

Refusal to give consent to take the minor child on holiday overseas

Both parents who hold parental responsibilities and rights of guardianship should consent to the minor child leaving South Africa for visits overseas. However, it often happens that custody agreements or Court orders don’t deal with this scenario. When the party separated, they did not foresee the possibility that the child might want to leave the country with the other parent. Nonetheless, this scenario is a reality. The parties, therefore, must be sensible and reach an amicable agreement regarding it. According to Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, if they cannot come to an agreement regarding the minor child leaving the country with the other parent, then, unfortunately, the court should be approached.

Refusal to give consent for the minor child to obtain a passport

When the children were young at the time of divorce or separation, the parents may not have seen the necessity for them to obtain a passport. However, things changed. Now that their children are teenagers, they may want to travel overseas with a parent. Should this occur, they would have to obtain a passport.

Here, too, the law stipulates that both parents must consent to the issuance of a passport if they are both guardians. Therefore, if one parent does not consent, then the Court should be approached. This would be very unfortunate, seeing that litigation is very expensive. The parties would need to appoint a legal practitioner to submit the application to the court and, if necessary, to oppose it. This would not be in the minor child’s best interest. Nonetheless, the court will decide what is in the best interest of the minor child concerned.

Child maintenance during the festive season

Lastly, we would like to touch on the issue regarding child maintenance during the festive season. During holiday times, children become more expensive. They eat more, want to go out more, and at the same time, use more water and electricity at home. Unfortunately, these added expenses can burden a parent caring for children during the holiday season. We, therefore, advise parents to timeously discuss these issues and see whether or not they can come to an agreement regarding the expenses of the child during the holidays.

Unfortunately, if a parent does not want to contribute more than he or she is currently contributing, the other parent would have to approach the maintenance court. The sad reality of this is that the maintenance court can take many months to finalise such an issue. We, therefore, implore all separated parents to be cognizant of this fact and try to be more generous regarding child maintenance during the holiday season.

Final words of advice by Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf for two parents who are separated during the festive season

As outlined above, it is essential that parents come to a timelessly agreed-upon arrangement regarding contact with a minor child during the festive season. If they do not do that, many problems can arise in the future. Some of them could be limited or have no contact with a minor child. It could also mean that a court should be approached should one parent not decide to provide contact to the minor child. This can all be avoided if the parties work together in what is best for the minor child concerned.

If, however, the parents cannot come to an agreement regarding contact, consent to travel abroad, or applying for a passport for a minor child, then they would have to resolve this matter in the High Court. This should be avoided at all costs.

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ABOUT ADVOCATE MUHAMMAD ABDUROAF

Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf is a hardworking and distinguished legal professional and a respected figure in the field of law in South Africa. Known for his unwavering commitment to justice and his ability to navigate complex legal challenges, Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf has built a career spanning over two decades, marked by excellence and a profound dedication to serving his clients and the broader community.

Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf’s journey into law began with a robust academic foundation. He pursued his legal studies with a vision to impact the justice system positively. His areas of expertise span a wide array of legal disciplines, making him a versatile advocate capable of handling multifaceted cases with precision and care. He holds both an LL.B. and LL.M. (Master of Laws) degree.

Throughout his career, Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf has been involved in numerous landmark cases that have set significant legal precedents. His methodical approach, combined with a deep understanding of the law, has earned him the respect of his peers and clients alike. He is known for his meticulous preparation and ability to craft compelling arguments that influence the course of justice. A recent landmark judgment in which he successfully represented his client was FCP v STC and Another (Appeal) 2025 JDR 0812 (WCC), where the Appeal Court supported his argument that a child’s right to maintenance and a parent’s responsibility in that regard cannot be terminated. Google his more recent judgments.

Two of his notable judgments of approximately two decades ago were when he successfully argued for his clients in the reported cases of:

• Petersen v Maintenance Officer Simon’s Town Maintenance Court and Others 2004 2 SA 56 (C) 381. Because of this case, it is now possible to claim maintenance from paternal grandparents of children born out of wedlock. This was not possible for over 80 years, and
• Soller v Maintenance Magistrate, Wynberg and Others 2006 2 SA 66 (C) 2006 446, where the Western Cape High Court confirmed the extensive powers of the Maintenance Court, which included interdicting pension funds to pay.

Trust Account Advocate

Advocate Abduroaf is a Trust Account Advocate. Therefore, his work comes to him via attorneys or directly from the public. Therefore, if you require the assistance of Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, you may approach him directly.

Contributions to the Community

Beyond the courtroom, Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf is deeply invested in online community development and legal education. He has organised and participated in numerous events aimed at empowering individuals with knowledge of their legal rights. His efforts to make the law accessible to all reflect his belief in the transformative power of knowledge and justice.

A Vision for the Future

Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf continues to inspire aspiring legal professionals and advocates. His career is a testament to the value of integrity, perseverance, and a relentless pursuit of justice. As he forges ahead, his contributions to the legal field and society as a whole remain invaluable.

In sum, Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf exemplifies the qualities of a dedicated advocate, using his knowledge and expertise to make a meaningful impact in the lives of many. His legacy is one of justice, compassion, and unwavering commitment to the rule of law.

CONNECT WITH ADVOCATE MUHAMMAD ABDUROAF

If you wish to connect with Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf, his website is www.abduroaf.co.za. We suggest you schedule an appointment with him if you require legal advice or legal representation.